From Dreams to Reality

Living Your Dreams – 5 Questions to Get You Focused in 2012

My daughter Tapoka fulfilling a dream of bungee jumping off Victoria Falls!

Question 1: What Do I Want to Do?

Do the right thing…

Decide what it is that you want to do. What's that thing that you've been meaning to do for ages, but keep putting off ? You know the excuses... You just can't seem to find the time... You don't have the necessary resources... It might not work... What will other people say or think... It's too much of a bother...

Get rid of all the excuses!

You only pass through this life once. Live your life to the fullest. That involves getting out of your comfort zone and taking a risk or two!

There is still so much that has to be done - inventions to be created, out-of-the-way places to be discovered and explored, lonely people to be comforted, hurting children to be hugged and fed...

Aim to make the world a better place for your having been here.   

Question 2: Why Do I Want to Do It?

Do it for the right reasons…

Motivation is so important. Often it's the key to success or failure (see New Year Resolutions: Top 3 Reasons Why Most Resolutions Fail).


You are one of a kind.  You are your own unique blend of personality, passion, talent and experiences. You were exclusively created by God for a purpose, and the world is eagerly waiting for the brilliance that you have to offer.

Connect with God’s higher purposes for your life, and really start living. 

Question 3: How Am I Going to Do It?

Do it in the right way…

Niccolo Machiavelli, the notorious 15^th century politician, was very wrong when he coined the phrase "the end justifies the means". In actual fact, 'the end is within the means'. The way in which you  reach your goal, is just as important as the goal itself. The way you get it is the way you’re going to keep it.


Doubtful methods - taking shortcuts, using people, being dishonest - may seem to work for a while, but will eventually boomerang on you in the end.

Take it from me, a previously chronic yo-yo dieter, who learned this lesson the hard way! Excess weight lost rapidly (through crash diets, marathon aerobic exercise sessions and other trusty methods i.e. starvation!) = Excess weight gained back rapidly (with several extra kilos added on for good measure!).

Question 4: When Am I Going to Do It?

Do it at the right time…

Timing is crucial. Opportunities can be lost, or at least seriously messed up, if you're too early or too late.


Before you can go after your dream, you may need to develop new skills, or perhaps become more mature in your character so that you have the capacity to properly achieve and handle your dream. Maybe you need to attend a training course, or be mentored by someone who is further along the road than you.

With some dreams you just have to dive in and learn as you go along. Don't be a perfectionist or procrastinate for so long that the window of opportunity passes you by.

Question 5: Who Am I Going to Do It With?

Do it with the right people…

It’s important to have the right people around you. Your relationships can make or break you. 


Get support from family and friends to help encourage you and keep you on track as you work your way towards your goal. 


Avoid toxic, negative people, who don’t believe in you or your dreams, and will only discourage, distract and delay you on the road to your brighter future.

New Year Resolutions: Top 3 Reasons Why Most Resolutions Fail

REASON Number 1: Wrong Motivation

Many people make New Year Resolutions with good intentions but the wrong motivation. For instance, common New Year Resolutions are: losing weight, getting fit, eating right or adopting a healthier lifestyle in some way. Very worthwhile goals. Unfortunately, this usually comes the morning after indulging in the various excesses associated with Christmas parties, New Year celebrations and family reunions – when you’re feeling bloated, hung over, and overcome with feelings of guilt. And family members who you haven’t seen for the past couple of years have told you over and over again how much weight you've put on!

What to do:

·         Make sure you want to make the change because you want to make the change.

When the going gets tough (around January 23!), you’re not going to force yourself out of bed at 5:00 in the morning, in the cold, dark and the rain, to go for your 30 minute jog around the neighbourhood, just because Aunt Mable who lives 200 miles away thinks that you’ve put on a few kilos!

·         Wait until the dust settles.

Trying to implement changes on 1^st January is usually a recipe for failure. For a start, you’re probably still in the middle of your New Year Celebrations! Take time to think things through and make proper plans to increase your chances of success.

REASON Number 2: Trying to Change Too Much at Once

It’s easy to kick off the New Year energized and full of hope, determined that this is the year when everything changes. Then, life happens.  Demands at work, expectations at home – before you know it you’re bogged down and doing anything new seems like too much of a hassle. It’s so much easier keeping things the way they’ve always been. Routine sets in. All good intentions fly out the window. Change will have to wait for another year.

What to do:  

·         Focus on making only one or two changes at a time.

Maybe you’ve decided that you want to: start exercising 3 times a week; eliminate all excess fat, sugar and processed food from your diet; increase fruits, vegetables and fibre; spend more time with your family; spend less time in front of the TV; learn a new hobby; make new friends; catch up with old friends; and get more rest. Don’t try to overhaul your entire lifestyle on the 1^st of January!

·         Take one step at a time.

For instance, you could concentrate on making regular exercise part of your everyday life. Then gradually introduce some of the other changes, like being more selective about what you eat.

REASON Number 3: Unrealistic Expectations

Human beings tend to be impatient. We want what we want and we want it now!

The bad news is – it took years and years of bad habits to get you where you are today. If you want to change, you’re going to have to replace old habits with new ones. And this takes time. The good news is – the power to change is in your hands! All you have to do is develop new habits to take you where you want to go.

What to do:

There are no short cuts.

It takes about 30 days, maybe even as long as 66 days[i], to change a habit and for the new habit to become truly ingrained as part of your every day life. 

  

·         Set realistic goals.

That excess weight came on slowly over the course of 5½ years. It’s not going to fall off in 3 months!

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[i] http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-happiness-project/200910/stop-expecting-change-your-habit-in-21-days; http://www.spring.org.uk/2009/09/how-long-to-form-a-habit.php